Being in a relationship with a wildland firefighter is not all one might imagine it to be. It’s not a cinderella story that’s for sure. Some see this breed of person and just swoon and get all googly eyed….yup I’ve been there. You think that this wild man or woman in a green and yellow uniform is that sexy knight in shining armor you’ve been looking for. Or hey maybe they would be fun to play around with for awhile. I swear it”s the uniform.. we women have a thing for a guy in uniform. I don’t know why but there is something about it. Unfortunately though we fall for the uniform and don’t realize the sacrifices that come with loving the person who wears it and what the jobs entail. After all they are human beings even in uniform.

Life within the Wildland fire world is not a fairytale. In fact these are some of the hardest relationships to maintain and it takes dedication and work every single day. It is not an easy life to live that’s for sure. Fire season can run anywhere from June to October, or longer. It can also run during other months depending upon where you live. Fire seasons have gotten longer than they used to be and they are more year round than just a few months out of the year.

During the fire season,you are separated from your spouse/significant other for 14-21 days at a time. If not more if they are on a crew that r&r’s in place and doesn’t get to come home for their 2-3 days off. After those 2-3 days, they are usually right back at it and gone again for another 14-21 days. That’s not always the case and sometimes with local fires it’s only a few days, or they are home late that night. Fire rolls can also mean no contact for that entire time, most wildfires occur in remote areas and that means no cell phone service, which occurs a majority of the time. Not only is it long days apart, sometimes with your man being across the country, it also means long working hours. Most fire shifts are about 16 hours. These can be day shifts or night shifts. Even if they are at home at their base station, they could be extended out past their normal working hours, and they may not find out until about 5 minutes before they were supposed to leave for home.

It’s spending your summers alone, because your the wife and fire’s the mistress and  that bitch gets all the attention. You have to learn to go and continue to live life without your best friend and still manage to have fun doing the things you both enjoy, just by yourself, or with your kids, if you have them,…for a majority of the year. Now I’m not trying to be a debbie downer I just want you to know the truth of what it’s like to live this life.

Everyone’s situation and life is different, but for the majority of us wives, this is what it’s like. Long hours, lots of alone time, and learning to live life with our partners gone for half of the year. I’m sorry to disappoint you, but this life is far from that fairytale life you may have dreamed of. That doesn’t mean it’s bad or not worth living, because even though this life isn’t a fairytale, the love you have for your person just might be and I can promise you it’s worth every minute and every sacrifice.